Archive for November, 2015

Today, my daughter had her recital at the UP Abelardo Hall, at the conclusion of the UP College of Music Extension Program for Piano for First Semester 2015-2016.  Around 24 kids performed  and they were all amazing. But this blog is not about the kids. It’s about the parents…

Typically, there were parents armed with cameras, positioning at the best angles to get the best possible memento of the occasion- a video or photo that they can share the world . This is all very admirable.

What is saddening is that, on each of the many recitals that I have attended for the past few years,  some moronic parent never fails to embarrass himself / herself by disrespecting other performers in favor of grabbing the best video angle for his  “Why my Kids Are The Best” collection of videos.

Last year, a couple had continuously taken flash photography of performances, even those not of their kids, for whatever reason.  It gave those of us at the back headaches, as well as disrupted performers and ruined video recordings.  A baby cried during the performance, while  yaya told him to hush, repeatedly,  making the situation worse,  when yaya  could have easily just brought the baby outside.

At the recital today, a particular family hogged the place as if nothing else mattered but their family members’ performances. Three of them were performing: father, daughter and son. Mom had the camera and had one or more companions, but  I do not know how many.

During performances, the said mom walked  across the front row  in order to fix the camera that she attached to a tripod , which  she had placed permanently  in  front of the first row .  She went back and forth repeatedly,  for whatever reason , I truly don’t care. She had her head and body down slightly  but was still very much visible to the audience. She coughed at many different times , conversed  with her kids at the middle aisle , her companion walked  in and out of the auditorium ..all while other kids were performing.

It made me sigh when I caught the shadow of her head and body on my camera and on the two other cameras my kids had used to record my youngest child’s performance at different angles from our own seats.

In between performances,  and after I have had enough, I told her how she had ruined my video and those of others and she said sorry, with a straight face.  It’s all frustrating that I see this family on the same recitals and they still haven’t learned the proper decorum. Daft and rude.

To this parent, I would like to present to you, the Etiquette for Recitals, so that you wouldn’t have to ruin another recital again.happy1


Etiquette for Recitals

  1. Do not be late. It  would be best to arrive a little early.
  2. Do not wear strong smelling perfumes.
  3. Sit quietly and listen to performances. This includes no talking, loud whispers, no continuous coughing, no wiggling or walking about. Remain seated. If you have to take a video in front, be very discrete and do not block the view.
  4. Go to the bathroom before hand. If you really have to go, wait for the current performance to finish before standing up and walking out.
  5. Do not use  flash photography.
  6. Silence your cell phone or turn it off.
  7. Attend the entire recital. Leaving in the middle of a performance is rude.
  8. Clap at appropriate times.
  9. Dress appropriately.
  10. Enjoy the music.

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It’s a subject that many  women, married or separated, would like to talk about but couldn’t , for fear of being criticized as materialistic, disloyal, or un-Christian.  It’s the subject of money, property or ownership, or lack thereof, that women have to deal with once a marriage comes to an end.

I think it’s time that women , whether in a relationship , or out of a failed one , get the proper guidance when it comes to securing their finances.

Perhaps many women would find themselves in the same shoes as my friend Mira:

“I thought I had finally met my dashing prince when I married my college sweetheart, but we did not live happily ever after.

We got divorced after two children, 16 years of marriage, and a move halfway around the globe. While the reasons for our divorce don’t matter now,  suffice it to say that I wasn’t prepared. Who prepares for divorce anyway? I should probably have left him earlier,  but having grown up in a predominantly Catholic country, I thought that the stigma associated with divorce was unnerving and shameful, at the very least. It gnawed my conscience for so long. I thought I had failed my parents, my in-laws, my friends, my upbringing, the nuns at the Catholic schools  I attended, and the priest who married us.

I  had two young children,   a few part-time jobs and  a mountain of debt, courtesy of my ex. I was beyond overwhelmed, but I decided to trudge on…”

Suddenly Single Women’s Guide to Finances: From Struggling to Secure Single, at any Age , written by  Mira Reverente and Tracy Marcynzsyn , is a  must-read book for  women  who are looking for  creative  yet  practical  financial advice that will help them pick up the pieces after a failed relationship.  Drawing from the authors’ personal experiences, the book is engaging as well as informative. Hear from the remarkable women who have been through the post-marriage financial jungle  and survived. Buy the book from  Amazon.com.



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